so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize