I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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