There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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