i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
