My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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