Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
grandma shit on top of the toilet
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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