i'm signing you up for texting rehab
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
