How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize