he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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