Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
