Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
