i already hear my dad disowning me
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Randomize
