Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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