...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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