Will you blow on my dice?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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