Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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