mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
