Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
