I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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