every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
