The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
