You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
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