but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize