I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
where does the pee come out of this thing
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
