Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Damn victory sex feels great
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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