My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
