we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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