you would pick up someone in the library
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize