she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
