dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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