So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
