I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize