Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Randomize
