The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Randomize
