I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
