Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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