So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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