Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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