Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
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