Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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