YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
