How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
