Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
