I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
