I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize