Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
