wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize