I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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