Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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