I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He shit in the fireplace
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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